Will we ever be free?

My life has been a living hell these past few months. My family hates me for being trans. They’re ruining my life. They’re buddy buddy with everyone in power rn— went to the Inaugural Ball and everything. I’m about to lose everything— I’m gonna have to drop out of college if I transition medically and figure it out myself. My whole life rerouted and my whole family disowning me.

But I just cannot detransition. I can’t bring myself to give into my parents’ demand. I’m in so much pain at the thought,, it will genuinely kill me to do so. I’ve been battling them for years (I’ve been out for nearly half my life). I understand how so many people are detransitioning for their safety at the moment but for some reason I just cannot fathom it. I don’t even know what detransitioning would look like for me?? This is who I am and I cannot just take it off. My transition is right for me. I’m a dude period the end. But it’s so overwhelming that I feel like either path I take will kill me at this point.

Why trans people? I just want to be free. I want a normal life. I just don’t know what to do and am curious if anyone feels the same. We can’t just erase who we are