Starting to hate university

I know, I enrolled here on my own accord but I didn't expect things to turn out this way.

Lifesci is torturous and I might be regretting this program altogether. I'm so lost academically. I've studied hard for all my midterms thus far but it doesn't reflect on my scores. One was an utter failure, the other two were pitiful (but could be worse). I study for hours a day, going through a bunch of revision, thinking I get the material since I can explain it comfortably and solve problems and the like. It just doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I have zero motivation to study because I feel so dejected. I'm afraid my GPA won't be at the spot I need it to be once I need to select my select year specialization. It's one of those with really limited enrolment but I've had my eyes set on it for over a year now and I'm desperate to get in. It's the one thing I'm still hopeful for because I'm genuinely passionate about that area.

I've had panic attacks right outside my lecture halls which have led me to skip a bunch of lectures because I just can't go into those rooms anymore. I hate chem labs. I've yet to have my second one and I'm already dreading it because the first one caused me to have a nervous breakdown and I ended up excusing myself to sob in the restroom. I'm so overwhelmed with it. I also regret the elective I picked this semester. Took it because it's advertised as a bird course but I find the lectures to be boring beyond measure and the work so menial (besides the group assignments which I didn't expect would be there) that I would've gladly skipped tutorials if attendance wasn't marked.

To add to that, I've completely lost my social life. I had friends going into university and have lost everyone by now. I try talking to them and get no reaction from them, I've invited them out and have asked to join them on their outings (they don't invite me to anything) and I get excluded every single time. They're always among themselves. Whatever, I just go out by myself. I've tried reaching out to other people to no avail either. Conversations either go stale or we don't get anywhere past one meetup. I only ever talk to the people in one of my lab cohorts for lab purposes. Nobody else from anywhere else. This probably hints at a problem with myself but I just can't pinpoint what exactly it is. All I know is that come a certain point, you're not content with being alone anymore. You're just lonely.

I live in a single room so I don't have a roommate. I've tried socializing in other ways, like going to clubs and whatnot but that's not been much help either. That, or I get socially anxious and either retreat early or straight-up back out at the last minute before going. It's just not happening. I can't socialize with people beyond text and it kills me. By no means do I want to come off as desperate but I'm so envious of the socialites out there who click with people right off the bat and have so many talking buddies. I just want one person I can actually be myself with. I just want to be a person someone can be unabashedly themselves with.

I'm back at home for reading week and my parents are bombarding me with their comments about how I'm a loner. It's just like secondary school all over again. I feel like I'm in this depressive state and that's affecting my performance in everything including my own hobbies. Nothing interests me anymore to the point where I just feel hollow as a being. I have nobody to go to about this, though I've booked an intake appointment with the SWC for sometime down the line.

Feeling lost. Nothing's working out so I've gone to the most shameful last resort which is making a throwaway account to vent. Not looking for pity, just lay it out straight since I don't even know what to do at this point.